Tannaz Hosseinpour

[00:00:00] You’re listening to Women’s Dream Enlightenment. Dream decoding deep discussions and stories of spiritual awakening to inspire your personal enlightened journey. I’m your host, Megan Mary, international bestselling metaphysical author. And founder of Inner Realms Publishing. Let’s bring in the light.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Welcome. Today we have Tanaz Hassan. She is a relationship coach and registered psychotherapist who helps individuals build emotionally secure relationships, starting with the one they have with themselves. She blends nervous system regulation, psychodynamic insights, somatic modalities, and belief reprogramming to help clients break [00:01:00] free from limiting beliefs and feel safe in love, purpose, and self-expression. Welcome to nas.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Thank you, Megan. I’m excited to be on.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Yes, it’s very nice to have you here today. And the first question that I’m gonna ask you is the one that I begin with. For every episode, and that is what does enlightenment mean to you?

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: I love this question, and for me, I think enlightenment means remembrance of wholeness. Of this moment where we, we realize the light that is within us, the light that we were born with, and the light that mm, is always next to us, even in those moments that we can’t see it. So enlightenment is that awareness, is that remembrance.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Very well put, and I really think that’s what spiritual awakening is all about, is that remembrance. I know it’s.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: [00:02:00] Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: It’s called an awakening, and a lot of people think it means a discovering of something that you never knew about before, and in a way it does, but

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: like to refer to it as a remembering,

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: reconnecting to what we were before

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: be again.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah, definitely.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: So I like to allow the space for my guests to share their personal experiences that brought them to do the work that they’re doing out in the world, and this time is no different. So I’d like you to us a little bit about what brought you be a psychotherapist and to work in the specific modalities that you specialize in.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Okay. So I did definitely did not have a traditional. Route to psychotherapy. I was conditioned to be a lawyer [00:03:00] and you know, I come from a Persian background, so you’re either a lawyer, doctor, or an engineer and nothing else kind of exists in that realm. So I was on path to, to be a lawyer. I was in my undergrad in the States at the time, and I experienced my first, I like to call life quake where everything goes.

Right, and you’re just sitting there and you’re thinking, what just happened? This is beyond my control. This is beyond my family’s control and my, I was blessed enough to be raised in a spiritual household. My mom was always reading spiritual texts. A lot of. Mysticism, being Persian and Sufism and Rumi and all of these great, powerful texts were really present in my home.

Of course, when you’re young, you have no interest in them, or I didn’t have interest in them, but a little bit prior to my first life quake, my mom kind of gave me the book, the Secret, and I remember I was in grade 12. I took it to [00:04:00] school and I’m like, everyone, we need to watch this for English Literature class.

And that was kind of like the entryway, but it didn’t really have that much of an impact as the first life quake. And I remember I was deep in despair. My mom kind of came into my room. And she said, I want you to read this book by Dr. Wayne Dyer. And that really was the entryway to self-awareness to that remembrance that we’re talking about.

Rumi has a beautiful quote. The wound is where the light enters you. So that shattering of the physical body, that shattering of the soul, really created space for me to, to go within, to become curious, to inquire. And that’s where the spiritual journey began. However, it didn’t change my path.

Of becoming a lawyer until I had finished my master’s in law, I had finished [00:05:00] another Master’s in management. And that’s when I was like, no, this isn’t resonating. I’m, I’m not meant to be doing this. It’s not sitting well with me. How do we end up, and I was doing dispute resolution law. How do we end up on, at this point where we’re fighting over, you know, the most mundane things, how do relationships fall apart to this point?

That again, became an entry way for me to entry point, for me to realize what relationships are, how they’re influenced, how we can be good at them. And I really believe that the universe speaks through us through other people. And during that time, I was hosting a book club that I still have to this day, and this is around eight years ago, and one of the girls said, you should look into coaching. I had no idea what that meant. I was like, not a trainer. I thought it meant like a physical coach, but I trust. At that point, I had studied enough of the literature and the books out there to [00:06:00] know how the light, the creator speaks to us.

And so I don’t take people’s suggestions lightly. I looked into it, I got my certification niched down on relationships, and it was around the same time someone suggested I start a podcast. I kind of had no idea what that was eight years ago, but again, I looked into it, started it, and three years ago kind of went back to school.

For my third postgraduate degree, this time in psychotherapy, to have more tools at my disposal to help people really become proactive with their relationships, with themselves, with their coworkers, family, friends. ’cause I really believe, we’re kind of brought into this world and we’re sent off to school and said, okay, go make friends.

And you’re thinking, how? How am I supposed to make friends? How am I supposed to keep friends? How am I supposed to show up? How are we supposed to fight fair? All of these skills that for majority of us, myself included, it wasn’t modeled to me in my family of origin. So I really didn’t know a lot of, a lot [00:07:00] of it, and a lot of it was trial and error.

So kind of gaining insights and sharing those insight became kind of my passion.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: love that you had so many different backgrounds and the way that retroactively it all seems to make sense. And also that you listened to your intuition and you said. I’ve achieved this level that I was told I needed to achieve,

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: but there’s something else it’s not resonating in my soul, and I need to figure out what that is.

And it’s an offshoot of this. I’m close, but it’s not exactly that. I also like that you followed signs, the suggestions because so many times they’re, they’re very easy to dismiss, and yet everyone that we interact with and that we cross [00:08:00] paths with, and every suggestion that is made another potential parallel reality.

It’s another. Trajectory we could go on with our lives if we so choose. And that’s the perfect example of how we do create our own reality. Because you either dismiss that and you go on your merry way, or you go down that path

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: what’s there. I.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah. Yeah. I’m not gonna lie and say it was an easy decision to make. I think it was extremely, at that time, especially, there was a lot of fear within me, fear of disappointing my family, fear of judgment. And, and I did receive that judgment. A lot of my friends were like, she’s losing it.

Like she was this hippie, cuckoo girl. Like, what do you mean you, you studied all this to let all of this go. And. I had to become comfortable sitting in that uncomfortable [00:09:00] position of judgment. Especially for me. I feel like I am a recovering perfectionist. So I had to recover and heal from that.

And there was a lot of people pleasing, which I think a lot of us have been conditioned. To kind of embody in our day-to-day life. So I also want to normalize the discomfort that comes with listening to these nudges that go so against what you’re meant to do, or what you’re conditioned to do.

And just because something feels hard doesn’t mean it’s not aligned.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Hmm, yes. Comfortable with the uncomfortable

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: definitely true for my journey in doing this podcast, off. Yeah. And you know yourself at doing a podcast. feel called to do something, but yet you feel so uncomfortable about it, but you also know you have to do it in your soul. And there’s [00:10:00] a point. Where you don’t have to, no one has to enforce their expectations on you anymore because you’ve already internalized them so much to the point that you are carrying it on. Even if they were to retract them, which they wouldn’t matter because you’ve identified yourself and your avatar and your path with all those internalized expectations, and it really does affect how we show up in the world and our expectations of others, right? Because we get brought up a certain way and we have those expectations understood. We put them upon ourselves, and then we expect the same of others. And not everyone else had that same upbringing or expectations, so they don’t understand.

How intense it can be.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah. Yeah, definitely. And I think this is where spirituality kind of comes in and it came in for me, is really [00:11:00] building that relationship with what I consider the creator, the light energy, whatever you want to call it, but to, to walk with that light, to feel that, that depth of that connection, to build a relationship that feels so supportive, so protective, so aligned.

I really think that helps. And actually I was in Southeast Asia last year doing a lot of research on the correlation between faith and mental health and when we do believe in something, again, whatever that can be for you, but having that relationship for me in particular was, was so grounding, was so healing and trusting that whatever’s happening is happening for my highest good. It’s happening through me. I am a conduit of this manifestation. It doesn’t belong to me. I’m simply here to be used as a vessel for [00:12:00] that creation. So kind of takes ego out of it, brings humility into it, and just a little bit more trust. And I think the more I’ve invested in that relationship, the more graceful life’s inevitable challenges have felt for me.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: That’s huge. Yes. understanding of being the conduit the death of the ego as part of that spiritual awakening path is huge because it no longer becomes your will. It’s your acceptance, your surrender

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: of that guidance, which is hard to explain to people that experienced it, but when you have, you understand that there’s, there is grace in that surrender and reward in a way because the reward is the relief of stopping yourself from trying to control [00:13:00] and fit yourself in a, in a. Circle in a square box, right? It’s because you understand that you, you can’t be that, that you have to be what is in your soul. But that takes so much courage and it takes so much deprogramming of the way that we have been led, misled That, and, we really have to strike out on our own.

And then when we do, I feel, when we, when we meet that challenge, is when we become a model for others to do the same. Not to do the same thing you’re doing, but to break out of their conceptions.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: yeah. Yeah. I love that you brought up the word control, Megan, because that word really resonates with me. I was a control freak and to the point where I remember when I would go on [00:14:00] trips, I would, especially group trips, I would print itineraries and say like, between this and this time, you will wake up and we will do X, Y, and Z.

And that’s how I felt safe. Right? Which is an illusion because the external world is outside of your. Of your control, but through those acts of control, I try to kind of maybe suppress the uncomfortable feelings that this lack of actual control in, in the world brought for me and realizing that really just accepting.

There’s nothing you can do. There is no conscious manifestation tool out there that is gonna help you control the external world, let go release, and I’m not gonna lie, building that closer relationship with the creator for me with light has helped to the point that I travel now. I just by a one way ticket.

I don’t book my hotel until the day of. I [00:15:00] wake up and I say, lights take me where were, where I’m meant to go. And my, you know, I was with my husband last year we were in Asia, and, and he said. How is it that whenever in any city we go to, there’s always a major festival happening? How do you not plan for it?

And it happens, and I was like, I just listen. Like I, I make last minute decisions. No, we shouldn’t do this. We shouldn’t go here. We should go here instead. The more you do it, it’s like a muscle. This the stronger that relationship becomes with the universe and with the creator. So it’s, it’s actually fun and it’s it’s a ter a term I’ve created that I love is making love to your life and like romanticizing love and, and that sensual connection with the universe for me, that that has been my saving grace.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: I like how that sounds too. It makes life seem so much less difficult when you

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: And [00:16:00] serious.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Yeah. Doesn’t sound so pressure full and so intense. Yeah. It’s much more joyous.

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Megan Mary – MeganMary: So in your journey, and particularly in your psychotherapy journey of learning that trade, dreams been a part of the modalities? Or the experience that you’ve had?

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: I work a lot with dreams when [00:18:00] I’m applying a Jungian perspective to the work that I am what Carl Jung’s. For those who aren’t familiar with Jungian theory, but for me personally, one of my dreams really propelled me into the spiritual realm, into the mysticism realm. And I’d love to share it because at that moment it made absolutely no sense to me.

I remember I was doing my postgrad, I was living in London at the time, this was around 11 years ago. And I, I was playing with angel cards and I pulled the card of a wedding, and at that time I was. Single and I was like, Hmm, my energy must be off tonight. Why am I pulling wedding? I went to sleep and that night again, I dreamt of a wedding and I’m thinking to myself, okay, again, like what is happening?

Maybe it’s ’cause like I thought about it and it’s now in my subconscious mind. The next morning I wake up at a friend who was visiting. From out of [00:19:00] the country called me and she said, I’m, I’m in town. Would you like to grab coffee and tea? And I said, sure. So we went for tea and I was wearing jeans and a shirt towards the end of our meet, she said, I wanna invite you somewhere, but I don’t know if you’ll be open to it.

I was. Am I going to a wedding? She was like, how did you know? I’m like, I bet I dreamt about it. I pulled a card about it. She’s like, yes, but. It’s at a place that you have said no to before. So prior to that, a lot of my friends were studying Kabbalah, which is another form of mysticism. And I had always felt really connected to Sufism.

And I said, okay, no, I’m not gonna go into Kabbalah. It feels very dogmatic for me, especially coming, I, I had done my undergrad in religion. I’ve always been fascinated by religion. But I didn’t like the structured element of it. And she said, just come. [00:20:00] Just come with me to the wedding. And I told her about the cards and the dream.

And I went and it was a beautiful wedding. I went with my jeans and my t-shirt. I felt so welcomed and the co-director, Michael Berg was there and everyone’s like, wow, Michael is never at a wedding. You’re so lucky. And they were like, come to the classes. I’m like, no, I’m traveling for my birthday. And just the dates kind of lined up.

The day of the cons, like the introduction class was. On my birthday, and then I was traveling for my birthday coming back on the day that the classes were starting. So like every excuse I had in the book kind of was going out the window, and that’s when I started studying Kabbalah. That also tremendously changed my life and opened me up to a deeper connection with the light.

And I love to kind of take from every different mystical modality, even therapeutic modality and just create a [00:21:00] system that works for me. So for me, that, that dream opened me up to experiencing for me a deeper level of connection with source.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Hmm. I love that story. Yes. And it was, again, another trajectory, another parallel life, another path in the forest, another option was presented. That could have been already happening in a parallel dimension and that you just said, okay, yeah, I’m gonna go down this road. And it was just presenting it.

Yeah. And we don’t understand the messages that we get, but there’s a funny thing about retroactively.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah. And just being curious, right, curiosity, that’s the best that we can do at any given moment. I heard this quote from Deepak Chopra many, many years ago, and he said, listen, whatever decision you’re making is the best decision you can be making in that given moment. So with [00:22:00] that level of awareness and consciousness, so that kind of takes the pressure off and says, as long as I’m curious, as long as I’m open, exactly as you said, you can always kind of shift

these timelines, and there is no right or wrong, it’s just a different experience.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Mm-hmm. And when you look at it that way, it really relieves yourself of the guilt and pressure of I made the wrong decision and what, what if, and I should have, and the should haves and that whole trajectory, because that’s, that’s really not leading you towards anything. It’s just pulling you back into your previous decisions.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah. Yeah.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: I would like to talk about ways that women can be supported and uplifted this platform I’ve created so that women can share their very personal stories, their dreams, their spiritual [00:23:00] journeys, and it really is to give a safe space for other women to listen to others and resonate with their own and gain more confidence in and solace in their experience.

So what are the some ways to that, to uplift and support other women?

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: First of all, thank you for creating that space. I. Really, really, really appreciate and honor anyone who allows us to lean into the notion of community. And this has been one of the pillars of my work. It’s my number one value in, in my personal life and my marriage is community. Because we’re traditionally tribal people, we thrive in supportive communities.

But yeah. Over time as a result of technology, globalization, lifestyle, that village is taken away from us and [00:24:00] we’re, we’re realizing the individualistic lifestyle doesn’t really serve us, especially women. It doesn’t serve us at all. We are meant to bring our, our pain, our joy to one another. We’re meant lean on one another.

Just saying this right now, it makes my skin warm because. We can’t do it alone, and we’re not meant to do it alone. So for me, always the advice is lean into community. If you don’t have it right now, create it. I remember during COVID, during the lockdown, there was this deep desire when within me to read Rumi Poetry, and I went online and I was looking for Rumi.

Poet, like Rumi groups and there wasn’t any. So I went on meet to up.com. I created a roomy meetup group and we met every week and the group started growing and growing for two years and that. I cannot tell you how seen my soul felt in that one hour that we would sit and talk [00:25:00] about topics that would light us up, because I couldn’t get that from my current circle.

As much as I love my friends, as much as I love my partner, I couldn’t get that need met there. So I created that group, I created that community. So my number one advice is always. Lean into sisterhood, into safe sisterhood. I kind of have to bring the word safe in here. Not every community is a safe community.

So just checking in with your body, how, how do I feel around this person? Do I feel expansive? Do I feel seen, heard, valued, understood. So first answer is community, and the second answer is really taking the time to, throughout the day. Regulate the nervous system to regulate. Just taking 60 second moments for ourselves.

I personally am not a one hour morning routine. I wake up in the morning and I have one simple prayer universe. Tell me where to go, what to say, and who to say it to. [00:26:00] And that’s it. I get up, I, I walk a little bit around, have some water, but throughout the day I’ll do 60 second breaks and I’ll do round. Breath work, 10 rounds of just four/four breathing, inhaling for four through the nose, and exhaling for four through the nose. Because I wanna gift my body , the gift of a regulated nervous system and a more expansive window of tolerance to tolerate the inevitable ups and downs, the challenges that will come my way so that I can respond with more grace, so that I can extend grace to myself.

So. These are my top two. One is community, and the second is just one minute. That’s all I’m asking. One minute every hour, every two hours, and I have this alarm on my phone. It goes off every day at eight and it says emotional check-in, and so it’s just for five minutes. I just sit for five minutes and I [00:27:00] ask myself, what are you feeling?

Where are you feeling it? And what is that emotion trying to say to me? So that, again, I can enhance my the voice of my gut intuition so I can listen to my body and I can create space for myself. Because if we don’t intentionally create these moments, we’re always like. On the run. And with women, we have so much , invisible mental load that we’re carrying in our households.

And if we don’t carve out those few minutes, we won’t have time for it and we’ll put everyone else’s needs ahead of our own. So really just a few minutes a day is the best gift you can give yourself.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: It’s great advice and I at one point. Meditating for long periods, and I am have such a tight schedule that, like you said, that I keep with myself that now it’s just a few minutes in the morning, but it’s enough [00:28:00] to reset myself and reframe my mind so that I’m going into my day with a positive mindset

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Mm-hmm.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: That, that push of, just being ready, like you said, for what the universe is gonna show me. And I do look forward to that. I do look forward each day to, where’s it gonna leave me today? What am

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Yeah.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: across? What news am I gonna get? What am I gonna find? That is an exciting thing for me, and it’s a good way to go through life as opposed to dreading your day. And the community part. I completely agree with you. That’s why I, again, created this and I just didn’t know if it was going to work. And when I put out the first call for the podcast, I sort of had this vision of all of these women dancing around this large bonfire and like I was calling all the [00:29:00] women in. And then I woke up the next morning and there was like 70 replies and I was like I can’t believe this.

Like, I was just stunned that I had. Put one spark. And that spark had just resonated out into the world and that everybody wanted to be a part of it. And there are days where I’m like, I don’t have time to do this, and I’m not in the mood and all that kind of thing. And then every time I do it, I’m like.

This is why I’m doing it. And whenever someone says I listened to that and it really resonated with me, it’s like, this is why I’m doing it. And it just reinforces each time that I’m just the conduit. I’m just holding the space and that I’m doing it because other people need to hear it.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: I love that. I love that. I love that you got that vision and you, answered that calling. I always say like the vision, if we’re using the [00:30:00] seven chakra system, the vision comes and we receive it through the crown chakra. We start to visualize it through the third eye. We speak it into existence through the throat.

We feel it in our heart. We do it and you know, the belly and then the creative part, and then we ground it. We, we. We physically manifested in the physical realm. And so even using our energy centers are even kind of showing us that all we need to do is say yes to it and the body will allow us to manifest through it and to literally be that conduit.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Yes, and thank you for bringing up the chakras because actually in the process of finalizing my third fiction novel, and I actually really use that concept in the plot. In terms of there’s seven keys to unravel and they very much correlate [00:31:00] with the chakra system,

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: How about that?

Megan Mary – MeganMary: it’s a multidimensional tale, but it really is grounded in that metaphor that each one of the centers is a key and that we have to unlock all of the centers to find that enlightenment and that alignment. So yes.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: I love that. Congrats.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Thank you. Well, are there any, closing words that you’d like to leave with everyone, and also let everyone know where they can find you out in the world.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Closing words, I would say is actually something that I was writing down today ’cause I’m, I’m hosting a wellness retreat for a woman in Tuscany in August and it’s based on self-worth and I was writing copy and something I love to always remind people is [00:32:00] self-worth is not earned. It is remembered. And so if we can just kind of sit with that, self-worth is not earned.

It is remembered and everything else falls under self-confidence per formation, like how we perform how we look. All of that can fall into different categories, but worth is innate. So I would like to leave the audience with that. And. You can find me everywhere on minutesongrowth. So minutes on growth.com.

You’ll find meditations there that you can download for free. I have a free ebook on 11 tools on nervous system regulations, so you can go through it, see which ones resonate. Build your own toolbox, customize toolbox. I have master classes. One-on-one that I work with clients, whether through a coaching container or a therapeutic container, depending on their location and the retreat that’s coming up, as well as a podcast, which is minutes on growth.

Megan Mary – MeganMary: Hmm. Wonderful [00:33:00] and wonderful words of wisdom to end with. Well, thank you so much for being here, Tannaz. I really appreciate it.

Tannaz | MinutesonGrowth: Thank you, Megan, for having me on.

Thank you for listening. Did you enjoy this episode? Be sure to subscribe to make sure you never miss an episode. Head over to my YouTube channel. and hit that subscribe button as well to be part of my growing community. Are you ready to take the next step in your spiritual journey?

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